lovetowrite

I had to get myself settled and the first thing I needed was to get a book from the Department of Transport. I wanted to read up on my driving test. I didn’t have a vehicle yet, but got a little practise on local roads.

My daughter and I wanted to explore the Tampa area, but it was hard for me with my husband still in England. He would telephone me and keep me updated on the process of the house.

Finally we had a date when he would be joining us. It was a month after I had arrived. I just couldn’t wait for that day to come so we could be together again.

My husband took me to the airport in England, and that day there had been a major accident on the M25.   The motorway that takes you around London so even though we had allowed an hour to get to the airport and 3 hours in the airport.  I was so worried I wouldn’t make it.

We finally got off the motorway and I got out a map, remember this was 1988, and no G.P.S. system.  We detoured through towns and the time for my flight was getting closer.

 We got to the airport within minutes of my flight leaving.  I ran to the counter and they told me the gate number and run as fast as I could.  I didn’t really get a chance to say ‘Goodbye’ to my husband, as I think I would have broken a World record, to ensure I made the flight.

They held the doors for me and one out of breathe lady got on the plane to bring her to America. 

We were so lucky because back in 1988 the housing market was booming in England and we were able to get top price for our home.  One of the cars and the motorcycles sold really quickly but other items really dragged.

 We planned on a date in July, but hubby had to stay to finalize the house and sell the contents.

My daughter was already over here and it was great being with her.  Hubby continued selling and then literally giving brand new items away because it would have been too costly to bring them here.

He was unable to sell the other car so that was left with his daughter to sell on our behalf.

Upon our return we knew that we had to tell the family, but how.  My parents were really distraught about it, and my mother basically ignored me, or gave me the ‘cold shoulder’.

 My daughter was the problem for me.  She said that she would come out to Florida and see if she liked it but didn’t want to leave her friends and my first husband’s family.  She also had one semester at college so I knew that she wouldn’t stay initially.

Then we would have to give 3 months notice to our employers, put our house on the market, sell 2 cars, 3 motorcycles, and everything we owned, apart from clothes and a few personal items.

This was a difficult time but we knew that it was to achieve our dream of living in America.

My husband had family in Tampa, Florida, so we arranged for a visit 5 months later. This was to see if we really did like America, as much as we remembered it.

Tampa was so different from the west coast, but better in other ways. We got to go to Busch Gardens, Disney World, as we had already been to Disney Land. We visited the wonderful beaches of Clearwater, St. Pete’s, and other smaller ones.

The shopping malls were amazing and the supermarkets so big, with much more variety than England.

The parks were huge and so many with lakes or on the water. This made us even more determined to live in America.

We booked a great vacation to L.A., Vegas, and San Fransisco back in 1987.  This was our first glimpse at the states, and we fell in love.  There was so much space here and so much to do compared with England.  We were totally in awe of our surroundings.

It was like opening a can of worms.  I just wanted to see more and do more.  We were here for 17 days and just didn’t want it to end.  We were dreading flying back to our boring lives in England.

 We reluctantly went back to England and knew that our lives had changed forever.

It was so hard returning to my former home. I looked at the bottom of the stairs and couldn’t get the picture out of my mind, where my first husband had put a knife to my neck, and threatened my life. I wasn’t at all happy in this house, so about a year later, we moved to a house in the next street. This was so that my daughter could still have all her friends close by and attend the same school.

My husband’s family arranged the funeral and didn’t consult me.  They booked cars, the funeral home, and a function afterwards.  I, of course attended with my daughter, but who got to pick up the bill. I did.My husband hadn’t kept up his life insurance, that I had been previously been paying, so there was no money only debts. We had a mortgage protection plan that I had paid for 12 years and he had lapsed that too. I was left with all his debts. I went back to the house and had to begin again.

We had been back and forth with the court system and it seemed as if it was never going to end.  I finally got my day in court and had to tell the Judge about the abusive life I had lived.  He said that he would grant a divorce and it would become final in 6 weeks.

 I had another court hearing for the custody of my daughter 4 weeks later, but before that could happen, my husband drank an entire bottle of whisky in a day, and dropped down dead.   Yes, I am totally serious.

I never went back to court, and my daughter was with me, and didn’t have to go through more legalities.  I am so very thankful.

My husband asked me to come back to him but after the threat to my life the drinking got worse.  I only saw him when I picked up or he dropped off my daughter to me.

 I filed for a divorce and as he contested it, it would take a year or two before it came through. 

I really got involved with my work and after a period of being lonely I started to go out and meet people.  The first time I went to a dance at an over 30’s club, I met my future husband.  He was the strength to get me through the following months and to get me focused on one thing.

To get my daughter back.